Couples counselling online, including after an affair
You might recognize this
- You found the messages. Now you’re both awake in different rooms.
- It’s the same fight about the dishes, and it’s never about the dishes.
- One of you pushes for an answer, the other goes quiet, and you both feel alone.
- You want to know if this can be fixed, or if you’re just postponing the end.
- Every holiday means choosing whose family wins, again.
The same fight on repeat, or the morning after you found the messages. Davis and Jasneet work with couples by video, without taking sides.
Davis and Jasneet work with this. Sessions from $145.
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How we work with it
Couples rarely come in about the thing they’re fighting about. The fight is about money, or in-laws, or a phone left face-down on the table. Underneath, it’s usually about something harder to say: “Do I matter to you? Are you still here?”
Two counsellors, two styles
Davis works from Emotion Focused Therapy. It helps couples see the loop they’re stuck in, where one partner pushes for a response and the other pulls back to keep the peace, and both read the other’s move as not caring. Once you can both see the loop, you can step out of it together. Davis also works with infidelity, porn and sex addiction inside relationships (including how disclosure is handled), and polyamorous and non-monogamous relationships.
Jasneet works with couples in English, Punjabi or Hindi. She slows the conversation down until you can both see what’s happening, then helps the unguarded sentence get said while the other person is still in the room. She knows how much in-laws, family expectations and “what will people say” can weigh on a marriage.
After an affair
If you were hurt: you don’t have to forgive on anyone’s timeline, and nobody will push you to stay. You can also start alone; see support for partners after an affair. The first goal is clarity: understanding what happened, and what you want, so you can decide well.
If you broke the trust: you’ll be expected to take responsibility, and you won’t be turned into the villain for an hour. Understanding why it happened isn’t an excuse; it’s how you make sure it doesn’t happen again.
Some couples rebuild. Some separate with less damage. Either can be a good outcome.
How couples sessions work online
Find a room with a door and one screen you can both see. (How online counselling works covers the tech.) Put the phones away. If the kids are home, a later slot may be easier. You can ask for a pause at any time, and one partner can step out if they need a minute. If the video drops, your counsellor will call and keep going. Between sessions you might get a short exercise to try together.
Who on our team works with this
Main specialty first. Not sure who fits? The free consultation is for exactly that.
Main specialty
Davis Wiggs
Registered Therapeutic Counsellor
Addiction, the quieter habits nobody talks about, and couples after betrayal. Kind, and he’ll still ask the hard question.
- Fees
- From $145 Sliding scale
- Times
- Tuesday to Thursday evenings, Saturday mornings and afternoons
Waitlist: join through Jane
Main specialty
Jasneet Purewal
Registered Therapeutic Counsellor
For the ones everyone else leans on. Family pressure, couples and life before or after marriage, in English, Punjabi or Hindi.
- Fees
- From $145 Sliding scale
- Times
- Weekends and most weekday evenings
- Languages
- English, ਪੰਜਾਬੀ Punjabi, हिन्दी Hindi
Good to know
Honest notes, including free options and when a different kind of help fits better.
If you’re afraid of your partner, couples counselling isn’t the right first step. VictimLinkBC is free, confidential and open 24/7: 1‑800‑563‑0808.
- If there’s violence, threats or controlling behaviour in the relationship, couples sessions can make things less safe. Start with individual sessions, and call VictimLinkBC (1‑800‑563‑0808, 24/7) for advice.
- Research on couples counselling by video is still early. We won’t promise it works the same as in a room. What we can say is that many couples find it easier to show up for, and we’ll help you set it up well.
- Couples sessions cost more than individual ones ($185 for 60 minutes, $220 for 90). Some benefit plans cover couples counselling; check yours.
Common questions
Will you take sides?
No. Your counsellor works for the relationship, not for one of you. After an affair, that means taking the hurt seriously and also understanding how the relationship got here.
Can I come on my own first?
Yes. The partner who was hurt often wants a session alone to think. So does the partner who broke the trust. You can book a free consultation by yourself.
Do we need to be in the same room?
Most couples sit together in front of one laptop. If you live apart, or need some distance right now, you can each join from your own device.
Do you work with polyamorous or non-monogamous relationships?
Yes. Davis works with polyamorous and consensually non-monogamous people, and won’t treat the structure of your relationship as the problem.
Can sessions be in Punjabi or Hindi?
Yes, with Jasneet. She also knows the pressure that in-laws and extended family can put on a marriage.
Start with one free conversation.
Start with a free consultation. Tell us a little, and we’ll help you pick the right person. It’s a conversation, not a commitment.
Next you’ll pick a time in Jane, our secure booking system. It asks for your name, email and phone.
Rather talk first? 250‑689‑6927